Linux server admin, MySQL/TSQL database admin, Python programmer, Linux gaming enthusiast and a forever GM.

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Joined 1 year ago
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Cake day: June 8th, 2023

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  • Technically yes, but I don’t mean technology as phones/laptops/tablets/etc. Imho, the biggest factor in social isolation is atomization due to bad urban planning. When everything and anything is only accessible by car, you lose any connection with your local neighbourhood and local stores/cafes/etc.

    In environments where people walk around the neighbourhood, doing small daily shops, going to local businesses and taking mass transit to work/school/restaurants/bars, then you’re much more likely to interact with people rather than driving around in your social isolation-mobile.

    Urban planning can be considered a form of technology, which is why I said technically yes.

    EDIT: Oh, another big factor here is the loss of the third place. It still exists in some places (local pubs in British towns, local coffee shop in Portugal, etc), but in places without a socially normal “hangout spot” that is separated from both home and work/school, it’s much harder to meet acquaintances which may in time become friends.









  • separately, it would be a travesty to say that the so-called “tribes” […] were “given to us by chance”

    What I meant by that is that you don’t decide where you’re born or who your parents are. That is “by chance” from the point of view of the individual.

    Humans are a tribal species. Whether we’re talking culture, ethnicity, nationality or any other method of defining who is inside or outside the group, the fact is we have an ingrained tendency to separate “us” from “them”.

    Modern psychology says that the process of becoming more and more inclusive and tolerant is the process of expanding your mental map of who your “tribe” is.

    This means that to truly accomplish our goal here (you and I seem to 100% agree on that goal), we need to expand people’s mental model of their tribe to encompass all people.








  • Exactly what I wanted to say. All that talk of “perfection” makes me imagine them snapping and going full psycho because a train was cancelled and they need to book a different one.

    To OP: just stop trying to plan that much. A general plan is good. Just be aware things will change and that’s ok. As long as you two are having a good time, the rest really doesn’t matter as much as you think it does.

    If you want a little psychological trick to make the trip more memorable than it otherwise would be, whatever you think is going to be the most impressive, save it for last. Our memories have a very strong recency bias.