Roll me up and throw me on the pile until the next epoch.

“I should not have tapped that.”

Lmao. I saw it and I immediately know it was the St. Augustine lighthouse. St. Augustine is the only thing I miss about Florida.

“You wouldn’t hit a man with glasses…,” said the man who stole someone’s glasses.

Beautiful.

I hope Al sees this, because I think he’d think it’s hilarious.

The revolution will not be televised, but the brainrot will be retweeted, liked, and followed.

Holy frijoles!

Lots of times when me and KG are watching

All the fucking shit that goes down at City Hall

We get the feeling we should fuck shit up

Yeah, we should fucking start a riot

A riot!

And the song continues to tell about the destruction of the government, with the implication that previous leaders are dead. It’s obviously a joke song, and when KG made the joke on stage it should have been taken just the same, but Hollywood Jack stepped in and thought about all of the movie deals he was gonna miss out on… like fucking Minecraft… Yeah. I love Jack, and I wish him the best, but I am on KG’s side, and if they haven’t fixed this shit on a personal level, and Kage comes out with some shit about Jack sucking, I’m gonna wave goodbye to the D.

That was my thought. I’m getting away from the crowd and the loud music. Can I smoke up there? If so, I might have to ask if it’s available to rent.

The Pass Go thing came from a friend of the family that came over for Christmas dinner one year. It went from $100 to $300 once all the properties were bought, and the reason was “so everyone can afford to land on hotel spaces.” So, yeah, completely defeating the point of late stage of the game.

This is it! Everyone I’ve ever met that hates monopoly doesn’t play by the rules. They don’t auction, they put all the money under free parking, and I’ve even had some people that increase the $100 when you pass go once all of the properties are bought. Of course you hate the game, you’ve been playing it wrong.

Lmao. I meant “blows my mind.” I was half asleep typing on my phone, so I’ll blame that. Either way, I’m leaving it :)

Good for him. He’s made some of my most favorite music, and for that I am forever grateful. I’ve read about his work ethic, and the fact that he’s still alive blows. I’m glad to hear he’s going to take it easy.

It would be a lot of fun, and I may do a one shot with it, but right now I have a two-year-old homebrew campaign that takes all of my DM prep time, so it’ll stay on the backburner for a while.

I’ll spoil it for you. The new “King” is a wanna-be evil wizard who is stealing magical artifacts from all over the land, all while trying to establish his own kingdom. He thinks that he can point suspicion elsewhere if he hires someone to look into the murder that he caused, all while setting up his own fiefdom in Cam, but then some out of town adventurers with actual muscle come in and fuck everything up. What follows is the evil wizard trying to frame the heroes for murder while also taking them out without drawing attention to himself. I think at some point there will be a heist, likely before the final battle, where the heroes steal the wizard’s artifacts and then use all of his ill-gotten gains against him.

That’s what I thought of when I was writing that. Knowing TTRPG players, that would all go out the window during session 1 when they decide to befriend the wizard and help him rule.

Before we get too much further into this, I’m gonna stop it. Lemmy isn’t really cut out for long term play, and I have to get to work on my campaign for next week. Peb, Ferro, it’s been a pleasure. May all your twenties be nat.

The king seems a little startled at your sudden declaration. He eyes you up and down, and then clears his throat.

“Ahem. Yes. It seems we have some volunteers, but they seem to be from another kingdom. Surely, one of the fine folk of Cam would readily take up the call?”

No one steps forward. The king seems a little apprehensive, and an insight roll tells you that he seems worried, but you can’t be sure about what.

“Uhh, I see. Very well, then, adventurer. What is your name?”

You arrive in the village of Cam, a small, backwater mudhole sandwiched between three swamps and a long dead forest. It isn’t your first choice, but you are confident that, if nothing else, people won’t give you a second glance as you walk through the gates covered in horseshit and what you hope is someone else’s blood.

However, you are more right than you think. No one is looking at you at all. In fact, you don’t see a soul in the town.

As you wander through the streets, you see the signs of life, but not a person in sight. Then, you hear it–a clamor–coming from the the edge of the westernmost swamp. Rounding the corner of a house of ill repute, you finally catch a glimpse of the townsfolk.

Walking towards them, you pick up on bits of the conversation. A woman, found dead and half-eaten, lies at the edge of the swamp. Any other time, this wouldn’t mean anything to you, but this time it’s different. Shes beautiful, or what’s left of her is. Clad in a beautiful blue gown, a crown–though now crumpled–lays near her porcelain face. She is striking, and it is obvious immediately that she isn’t from this town.

Over the murmur of the crowd, a voice can be heard.

“As the new king of this sad lot, I see that it falls to me to be the hand of the law. Citizens of Cam, your king requests the aid of those of stout body and sharp wit to assist the kingdom in finding out who is responsible for the death of this poor young woman. I promise 50 gold pieces for any information of value, and a full 500 gold for the capture of the nefarious soul responsible.”

500 gold will go a long way to making sure you never have to eat trail rations again, and really, how hard could it be to track down a killer out here in the middle of nowhere?

I really don’t know why people announce these things. They have to know by now that Nintendo will squash anything and everything that uses their IP and/or assets. It’s like taking your first Tae Kwon Do lesson and celebrating by telling all your bullies.